My husband and I have been married for 10 years, together for 12 and we no longer live together, but we are even more in love than we have ever been with each other. Over the years, I dealt with severe health issues and my husband was by my side the entire time. It played a huge role in our lives with lengthy hospital stays, endless misdiagnosis, too many doctors visits and late nights not knowing if I was going to make it. He got caregiver burnout and I didn’t know how to be a proper wife anymore. Our marriage turned into a silent torture chamber for both of us. I would be a zombie and switch between sitting on the couch not watching the tv that I had blaring to sleeping most of the day. Our problems came to a head a year ago and, while he was out of town, I found a place of my own 2 hours away from the home we had shared for 7 years. I had absolutely no contact with him for 4 months and those decisions, as dramatic and difficult as they were, saved my marriage and ultimately my friendship with my husband. We have separate friends, separate schedules, separate lives. We see each other every weekend and we completely enjoy spending Friday – Monday together. Our sex life has never been hotter, our communication has never been stronger, we have never been so much “us” as we are now. We have found happiness in our separate but married status. We get a lot of flak for this decision, but that goes back to traditional thinking and stereotypes of what marriage in our society should be. I think that if more couples tried this lifestyle before they called it quits, the divorce rate would probably drop. Just my opinion.
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